farfromfearless
Jeremy Lusk | Divorce sometimes is not the only thing that separates us
Many of you may not know whom Jeremey Lusk is. He is a freestyle motocross rider. He died Monday night from a head injury suffered while competing in an extreme sport contest. He was only 24.
Life brings us may challenges, highs and lows. Here is an example of a young man, top of his game that was tragically lost. What does this have to do with a divorce blog? Sometimes we get so caught up in our own small world that we forget about the biggest picture. Living life each and every day. Jeremy Lusk was survived by his wife Lauren Lusk. She lost her husband Monday. One can only imagine her pain and the long road to her recovery.
Again, what does this have to do with a divorce blog? I have been following several divorce blogs on the web and monitoring the treads of conversation. How the divorce caused “so and so” so much pain, how “i will never be able to date again”, etc….. True, a divorce is a trying moment. But to put things in perspective it was a relationship that did not work out…true that it is still a loss, but it was not a loss due to death. Put things into perspective in your recovery from a relationship gone bad.
I would love to hear some comments or thoughts on the difference between losing a spouse vs. breaking up. I know the difference, but I want us all to see that in the big picture, your divorce or relationship distress is something that can be manageable, in most cases. Knowing that, you may take a bit of comfort that your divorce is not the end of the world. I realize this is not applicable to abusive or other very bad situations, but for the most part it still holds true!
My thoughts and prayers go out to Lauren Lusk and the entire family. I was a fan!
Picture credit: Perezhilton.comLast 5 posts in Features
- Divorced man marries couple, film at 11:00 | You may now kiss the bride! - April 27th, 2009
- Now Drive Me Far. I Don't Care Where, Just Far. - April 11th, 2009
- This is not a divorce story, it is a history story! - February 4th, 2009
- And for some different divorce support | All you need is love! - January 27th, 2009
- Is Facebook a Divorce Recovery Tool and Divorce Support Group? - December 27th, 2008
4 people have left comments
Cathy said:
I hink someone’s perspective on this subject depends on what kind of divorce they went through. I was divorced after a long-term marriage. He left and when he did he took my future with him and made a mockery of my past. He changed my life and the life of our children and the course we were on. I lost my husband. Not through death but divorce but, just the same I lost my husband.
The difference between what I went through and what this young wife is going through is simple. She knows that if possible her husband would fight with all he had to still be here with her. She doesn’t have to live with the knowledge that her husband is out there somewhere and no longer wants her or the family they built together. I and other women who go through the kind of divorce I went through don’t have the comfort of knowing our husbands would have done anything to stay with us and, when a husband is lost to you knowing that can be a very comforting thought.
I’m not trying to diminish the depth of her loss. My heart goes out to her and this young man’s family. She will be surrounded by and supported by friends and family. She viewed as a widow and that label comes with respect and caring from others.
When you are a woman who lost her husband via divorce the labels are different. The support system isn’t there but the pain of loss is. But, you are expected to “get over it,” “move one,” “let it go.” Can you imagine people saying such things to this young widow?
Loss is loss and pain is relative and losing a husband due to divorce can be as devastating as losing him to death. I wish niether one on any man or woman who loves their spouse.
Adam said:
Cathy,
Thank you so much for this comment. This is exactly what I was hoping for. Yes, a loss is a loss. You could not be more correct. The goal of this site is to explore and recover though support and knowing that there are others out there going though a spectrum of different situations. From this, I hope that people will gain comfort. I thank you for your perspective and hope that you comment or contribute elsewhere to this site.
Adam
- Copyright 2012 Adam’s Wedding Dress. All Rights Reserved. My kudos to Chris Murphy for this theme.
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