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Adam’s Dad | Advice from a 64 year marriage

Posted: June 13, 2009
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Author: Dad
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Filed under: Ask Adam's Dad
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Tags: child, children, divorce, marriage, relationship

Adam's Dad has not posted in a while, but we welcome him back with an article on a great life experience. Why on a divorce blog do we have topics written by a successfully married man? Easy answer...from these topics ANYONE can learn. Isn't "growing up" all about learning...I never stop learning, so I suppose I will never stop growing up!

GROWING UP IN A RELATIONSHIP

Permit me to ask you a question: Do you know when you grew up? Was it when you got your drivers license? When you voted for the first time? When you could legally get your first alcoholic drink? When you graduated college? When you got married? The government told you when these things could happen. What do you think?

I am able to tell you exactly when I grew up. Believe it or not, I was married, had two children and was in my forties. Let me start at the beginning.

Adam’s mom and I will be married 64 years this year. As you might expect, there were many bumps along the way. However, we managed to get past them and it was never necessary to even think of divorce. We were partners and we were a team. As with any team (think Kobe Bryant here), there were disagreements. It was during one of these disagreements that I grew up.
We had been married about 20 years and we were in the middle of one of our disagreements. It was getting louder (on my part) and moving in a very bad direction. When the intensity almost reached shouting, Mrs. Weston asked, “Why are you shouting at me?” I thought about that for several seconds, and then I grew up.

My answer? BECAUSE I WAS WRONG!

I had acknowledged that I owned the problem. It did not diminish my stature in her eyes, exactly the opposite; I became more of a man and a husband. We kissed, made up and laughed about the whole thing.

When you have been married as long as we have, then you may be sure you are grown up. Until then, practice, practice, practice.

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