CHEATING in the Media

• Posted: September 1, 2009
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• Author: Daniella
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• Filed under: Ask the Single Parent
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• Tags: deceit, having an affair, president clinton

I’m so over , “Breaking News, so and so was caught having an affair. Next up the author of Why Men Cheat”. Must we be inundated with books, articles, new coverage about cheating and how to save your marriages or what makes your spouse? No! Stop buying the crappy literature. Furthermore, stop buying into it period. People cheat. It’s a fact, albeit an ugly fact but it’s a fact and one that will probably remain not so much a mystery but simply an indefinite fact of life.

Henry the VIII not only committed adultery he beheaded his wives. Gov. Mark Sanford engaged in an affair with his close friend. Ex-Senator John Edwards had an affair with a colleague. Ex-Gov. Elliot Spitzer had sex with a call girl, and the infamous President Clinton – who can forget Monica Lewinsky?! My friends husband had an affair with a family friend then married her. A sense of entitlement, the thrill of the chase, ego embellishing reasons? It’s safe to say all the above with many many more varying factors.

I do not condone this behavior! Hell, my ex-husband not only cheated he lived a double life and while I was pregnant. Was I besieged with the ut most deceit? Yes! But I also had to take a very deep look inside myself. What part did I have in my man straying? Love is an odd thing. There’s no rhyme or reason. Connections come and go. Sex can become banal. However, I do believe love is something a couple must work on for as long as it takes before it comes crashing down on them both. People grow; we change and we hope we’ll continue to evolve, together. Clearly, this is not the case. 50% of first marriages in America end in divorce according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology.

I fell in love for the first time when I was 17. This boy was everything to me. My family took him in under their wings. My father gave him a job. He was treated as one of their own. He not only cheated on me but his actions were nothing less than spitting in my parent’s eyes. Men cheat. Women cheat and it starts at a young age in spite of the consequences. Cheating sucks and obviously causes insurmountable pain but it is not a disease (sex addiction is another issue). Yes people have the ability to change but come on, there’s no cure for infidelity.

I will not buy into the b.s. the media and publishers want to sell me. I will continue to have faith that when and if I a love finds me we will communicate and when our needs are no longer being met we will strive for positive change, together.

FYI  – 40% of women cheat, some research suggests. The incidence of female infidelity has more than doubled in the last 36 years. And Italy’s highest appeal court has ruled that married Italian women who commit adultery are entitled to lie about it to protect their honour.

Always,
Daniella

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